Tag Archives: rude pundit

A Rude comparison

The Rude Pundit is the very apt pseudonym of one Lee Papa, a professor of drama studies and writer of some fine bloggery. He’s funny, and very, very rude. Way more rude than I am.

Like all of us, RP’s been watching Egypt this week. And he made a connection that I wish I’d made — and maybe would’ve if my real life job didn’t involve living and breathing Egypt for the last two and half weeks.

So the Rude Pundit was watching the (now celebratory) Egyptian uprising on CNN when he noticed that every single random protester interviewed by the news network’s reporters was incredibly articulate and thoughtful in their comments on Mubarak and democracy. In English, which, one can presume, is not their first language. And then he thought about recent American “protests,” the Tea Party rallies and teabag fests, and how not a single one of the “average” people interviewed there made a goddamned lick of sense. In English, which, one can presume, is the native language of the teabaggers.

Whereas an Egyptian in Tahrir Square generally says things about how Mubarak has demonstrably repressed the masses of citizens, a teabagger makes sputtering, guttural noises that amount to “Blurgh. Obama. Blurgh,” which has about as much of a basis in reality as it does in English syntax and grammar. It’s a fascinating phenomenon, one that should probably be studied by linguists, sociologists, and stand-up comedians.

Oh yeah. “Blurgh. Obama. Blurgh.” Ain’t that just so right?

Now, I had gotten as far as thinking, “Man, these Egyptians sure speak terrific English,” and I was really annoyed by the Republican/Tea Party mantra of “Obama fucked this up,” “Muslim Brotherhood! Ack!” and some crazy shit about a Caliphate, but I hadn’t gotten around to a comparison.

Oh, and then there’s all the crap about how come Obama didn’t pressure Iran into going democratic back when the Green Revolution was going on. Well, duh, morons. Iran isn’t our friend. Neither the Ayatollah nor Mahmoud Ahmadinejad gives a shit if we think they should treat their people better. But that’s another post. This one is about how fucking stupid Americans really are.

Indeed, one of the things the events in Egypt have shown Americans is what a serious effort to overthrow a government looks like. It’s enormous, it’s sustained, and it’s angry. If one calls one’s movement a “tea party,” even if it’s named after the night a bunch of drunken thugs in costume hired by greedy merchants vandalized British ships, then one shouldn’t be surprised if one’s movement behaves like a bunch of little girls pouring water into tiny cups for their stuffed bears.

RP shares a couple of photographs of Egyptian anti-government protesters and Tea Bagger anti-government … somethings. Big diff.

But since reading Rude’s post, all I can do is be embarassed for these lesser humans, the ones who think they’re being oppressed by a government that doesn’t lock them up and torture them (that’s reserved for … well, Egyptians, and other people with darker skin tones).

In Egypt, they have been revolting against a government that has stripped away their rights, with the arrest and random torture of citizens, with a three-decade state of emergency in existence, with corruption wrecking the standard of life for the populace. The Egyptians have been intense and unrelenting, sacrificing their time, their bodies, their jobs, and, in some cases, their lives in order to guarantee democracy in their country, doing so with comparatively little violence. In the United States, a few cranks didn’t like the way an election went. And they wandered aimlessly for a little while, listening to their incoherent speakers, fondling their guns that most of them will never really use, but, oh, they can fantasize, and then they went home until it was time to vote again, probably stopping at the Taco Bell drive-thru on the way to watch Beck on the Tivo.

Now, which method worked? So, dear, pseudo-active teabaggers, put up or shut up. But mostly, shut up. And enjoy the sight of anĀ actual revolution instead of your fake one. Watch history being made instead of pretending that you are part of anything other than a minor blip on a dim radar.

Sadly, Rude’s words won’t penetrate the thick skulls of a backwards, unevolved people, in the extremely off-chance that what he wrote actually passes in front of their eyes and they can get past where he says he was watching the uprising on CNN.

But for you, my fine friends, it’s worth reading.